Pliss to give me some coffee!

I feel like a mumbling idiot at Starbucks Coffee...literally. I am sorry Starbucks, I am not a regular at your stores, nor do I know exactly what I want the moment I walk in. Call me slow, but I need to go through the huge menu you have, figure out if I want a latte, a cappuccino, an espresso, a frappuccino, chai latte or a Tall, Grande or Venti size (wait a second, isn't that Italian? Of course I am smart enough to figure out which is which from the price tag but I need a moment). Please tell the person taking my order not to look at me like I descended from some alien spaceship that doesn't speak their language (whaaaat...you don't have a favorite?). I also think your drinks are overpriced although there is a distinct coolness to walking out with a starbucks or just lounging around in the store arising from the aforesaid pricey-ness.

Thank you but I am good with my humble instant Nescafe coffee.

If any of you don't believe me, there is a whole page dedicated to this at http://www.wikihow.com/Order-at-Starbucks. Really??

P.S: Pliss to = Cheesy way of saying  "Please"